So I told you all that my grandpa is doing better, well I lied. It seems now that he's so much worse. He can't swallow on his own, so they're moving him to a nursing home. They've been feeding him fluids, but according his living will, my grandpa requested that if he were to be in a vegetive state (which he is now), that he be taken off life support, and once he gets to the nursing home that's going to happen. They say he'll live for about seven days and the die. I walked to my mom's car after school and was all happy from my good day at school and then I got into the car and she started to bawl, even though its my dad's dad. And the weird thing is that even though I've gotten teary eyed and such, I haven't cried. I'm really sad and at church tonight when they said his name to pray for him I almost lost it, but otherwise I've been fine. I'm suprisingly very calm and collected. And its because I think that this is actually a good thing. Now I now how bad that sounds, but he's finally going to be at peace. And besides, I believe that I'll see him again in heaven. (Everytime I say that I almost start to cry). So I'm totally at peace with the whole thing, but my mom cries all the time and my dad just got home and he is trying to act all happy and fine but I can see that he's about to cry every time we talk about it. And thats the scariest thing because things must be really bad for my dad to lose it. He was crying on the car ride home. So this is my life now, and I hate being at home because its so depressing. And this is all before my mom's birthday and our spring break trip to NYC. And this isn't even the funeral yet. It just keeps getting worse. I just wish this would all go away.